Tuesday, October 28, 2008

I'm much too young to feel this damn old

Yes, I quoted Garth Brooks. What of it?!

I am so tired. I shouldn't be. It's weird. I could hardly stay awake coming home from Jaymes' OT session. So I'm sitting here on the toilet (just sitting, nothing gross!) with my laptop watching the kids take a bath. Before that I was sitting on the couch watching them pour pretzels everywhere. Jason will be furious at me if it's not perfect when he gets home but I don't even care anymore.

Jaymes did good at OT. The Speech therapist told me that when she went to observe him (she's a saint for doing that) that he was also awesome. I am so proud of my lil buddy.

Now if only he were like that at home. I admit that it's gotta be my fault. Obviously, if he's good pretty much everywhere else, it's me. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I wish someone would tell me, so I could fix it.

I'm back to this whole non sleeping thing. I lay there all night and watch the clock. It pisses me off. all the little noises all night make me angry and by morning I want to kill someone.

But all in all, it's been worse. I can't complain too much. I'm blessed in too many ways to hate life entirely right now:

  • Great kids
  • Awesome therapists for The Boy
  • Sierra has this cute dimple right above her butt that makes me laugh (they're in the tub, I can't help but see it!)
  • My dogs are happily munching pretzels off the floor
  • My best friend forgave me for my stupidity
  • It's almost bedtime and I'm going to take some Seroquel (literally a little chip scraped off one of my ancient Seroquel's puts me out all night)
  • Jason's not home... So it's peaceful.
Life could be worse.

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