Friday, February 27, 2009

Today, we are normal.

When I posted earlier, Jaymes wasn't home yet, so who knew today we could pretend that there is no autism, that we're just ordinary! He has been such a happy little thing, so helpful, so bubbly and pleasant. He bounced off the bus this afternoon, walked happily home with me, holding my hand (willingly!). Came home, he asked very nicely for a snack so I gave him a Go-Gurt and a cup of pretzels. We settled on the couch, watched some Thomas the Tank (video we got from a dear internet friend), and snuggled. He took off his shoes and put them on the shelf, and hung up his backpack and coat.

Later, we went outside during a brief lull in the rain that's been sprinkling all day long. He went on the slide, antagonized Sierra a tiny bit by trying to push her on the swing (she doesn't like him to touch her, and vice versa) but that's normal sibling stuff. I pulled out our new mare, Lucy and Jaymes spent some time brushing her. He picked out the mane comb and made a really great effort at untangling her beautiful but snarled mass of mane. When he was done, he told me so. He said "I want house", so we went inside with a little tantrum from Sierra, who was clearly not ready yet to go inside.

The kids took a bath together, and Jaymes brushed his teeth and played and swam like a little fishie. He willingly got out, I dried him off and he let me do his lotion. He was so silly, giggling like I was purposefully tickling him to death and yelling "Motion! Motion!" (His L sound is like an M sound, so Lion is "Mion" and Lotion is "motion.")

He stood next to the table and ate his meal with his fork. He did not want his pineapple, but when prompted, he did willingly take a lick of it. That's enough for me, he tried it. He's entitled to having foods he simply does not like. I won't eat mushrooms because well.. They're foul. So if he feels pineapple and strawberries are foul, that's his choice. I think a lot of the time in an effort to teach our special needs kids to eat, we forget that they too are human and that they deserve to be respected and not forced to eat things they really do find objectionable. Besides, more strawberries for mommy! He did do a bunch of weird stimmming right after eating, while lying on the couch. He raises his arms and does these tai-chi type moves and just watches him hands and arms moving. It's a quiet, peaceful, relaxed stim, so I won't interfere with it.

I put him in his net swing before bed, with blankie and snakie on top of him, and Sierra plopped over all that. Who needs an expensive weighted blanket when you have a swing, a giant toy snake, and a baby? Jaymes relaxes so much with the combination of the motion of the swing, the pressure being hung in a net swing gives him, plus Sierra's weight on his legs. Sierra has a ball, because she's included and she laughs and giggles and talks to me. After about 15 minutes of swinging, Jaymes was a limp little spaghetti noodle, and jason carted him away to bed. He curled up under his covers and went to sleep peacefully.

No tantrums. No hitting. No screaming. no head banging. He ate. He bathed. He put his stuff away.

I am so proud of Jaymes. This has been our week. What a sweet, happy, calm little boy he has been. I don't know why, must be the change from the Clonidine pill to the patch. He can be calm and under control on a consistant basis- he feels ok in his own skin finally. It is so much nicer, for all of us.

He's not perfect, not by a longshot. None of us are. We still have upset moments and tantrums, and that's fine. That's life with a 2 year old and a 5 year old. I don't expect perfection from Jaymes or Sierra. I don't get mad at Jaymes, who cannot come within a mile of a cup of juice without spilling it, or Sierra who tosses her used diapers in the toilet for me to discover later on, swollen to the size of a small manatee.

We're all a little nutty, that's part of our charm. Or so I've been told. I guess my point is, we got to be a typical family today, and this week. No earthshattering tantrums, no self injurious behavior, no blowups in public.

I love my children, and I love that Jaymes is doing so incredibly well in everything right now. I'm so proud of my little man, and so grateful to the doctors and the therapists, and our wonderful case worker. We have an incredible group of people working for Jaymes, and it really shows. He's come such a long way.


Halo said...

Sounds like Jaymes is doing well, be proud of yourself as well as him, your doing a great job :)

Princess Fiona (according to my husband) said...

I so love that finding dirty nappies IN your toilet is 'normal'! There's hope for the rest of us yet. Well done.