Friday, August 15, 2008

Oral Hell

Apparently yesterday's oral fixation was just the beginning. It started out with Jaymes making all kinds of odd mouth, lip, and tongue movements during Speech, then progressed into him chewing on everything in PT... Then that evening, he started to gag himself with his hands to make himself vomit. He also started chewing his hand and fingers obsessively and rubbing his face.

Today, everything got 100 times worse. We decided to go to the Children's Museum, where Jaymes can run wild without needing to be held back from things usually. He took off like a shot, running to the train area. Trains are the new obsession. and I do mean obsession.

He took every train car from all the train tables, and from all the other kids. He made a super long train with them, and attacked every kid who came near. I dragged him away after he got aggressive with another child, and he went hysterical. Screaming and kicking. So I hauled him out front of the museum, and sat him on the sidewalk and myself on a metal bench. The tantrum got louder and louder, and more and more violent. He threw himself down the concrete stairs, slammed his face hard against the sidewalk, kicked and flailed and beat his arms and legs against the ground until he was crying from pain (as well as the initial tantrum). I picked him up, and sat him next to me on the bench, and he started to pound his face against the metal of the back rail on the bench. So we went to the car, and I sat him on my lap in the passenger seat, held his arms and legs down under mine, and tried to ride it out. An hour later, still screaming. So loud that everyone in the vicinity was staring at me, probably thinking I was killing Jaymes. We were both covered in sweat, from fighting each other, and I really was barely holdiong onto him. He's quite strong, for a little guy. He would have been a little calmer after awhile if I had not held him, but I think he would have very seriously hurt himself. He tried to take the glass from our passanger side mirror and scratch himself with it.

Then, suddenly, I felt teeth clamp onto my arm. he has NEVER bitten me like that. Not out of anger, with intent to hurt. Admittedly, it was probably because I was holding him... but still. A first, and not a good one. My arm is purple and red and blue, and there is a hard knot under the bite. He also hit me in the face with his head, second bloody nose in 2 days courtesy of Jaymes. My face and my arm hurt, and I'm getting pretty damn sick of this.

Jason and I switched out, determined that Sierra would at least get to have her fun at the museum. She loved it, she ran around and giggled, sat in the mail truck, played Doctor Sierra, and built with huge lego blocks.

And then Jason called me. Apparently, when it was his turn to deal with Jaymes, he just buckled him in the car seat and read a book, paying no attention to Jaymes. I won't even get started on the idiocy there... But anyway, Jason looked back at one point, when jaymes had gotten quiet, and saw that his face was gushing blood. Apparently he had smacked his face against the side of the car door, or else hit himself to the point of causing a raging bloody nose. Jaymes was covered in blood, the car was covered in blood, Jason was covered in blood.

He never did calm down enough to go back in. We left, Jaymes still sobbing. He was covered in blood from his nose, his face is all scratched up (his doing), his arms and legs are scraped and bruised from throwing himself down, and he has a big ole bump on his head from where he hit it on the bench. He spent the car ride home trying to make himself throw up, and biting his hands.

I am at a loss. No one seems to understand how serious this is getting, nor offering any useful solutions. Is it going to take Jaymes sending himself or me to the hospital before everyone sees that I'm not exaggerating, that we need to do SOMETHING, anything, immediately?

I don't know what I want done. I don't know if there is anything TO be done. I just want Jaymes not to beat the living hell out of himself and me.


4HorsesandHolding said...

Squishy, I am so sorry.

I don't have a lot to offer you in the way of advice.

Stay strong, girl!

We love you!

Tara Nicole said...

WOW is all I can say....*sighs* I have not dealt with many children with Autism...only one little girl...and she would bite, lick, kick, pull your pretty much anything...not including all of those to herself. VERY disturbing and sad...they kept her in this "net" bed so that she could not hurt herself...but she also could not walk and could only stand while holding onto something. Had a trach and was on respiratory support. Jaymes from as much as I can express is at least higher functioning.

I'm sooo sorry babe! There is NO one but you and all the other parents that have children like Jaymes can trully understand the challenges that you have each and everyday!

BTW what medications do they have Jaymes taking? And also 1 in 3 or 1 in 4 kids with Autism have seizure disorders...does he?

horsefix said...

He is so lucky to have a mom as patient and understanding as you.

Lala said...

I think I would have lost it much sooner. I don't know how you hold yourself together.

heather said...

Hey wonderful mother- You are the MOM God chose to Love Jaymes unconditionally & perservere this storm. You WILL get through it. I KNOW how hard it is. I have a son w/autism and a neuromuscular disorder & severe hypotonia and macrocephaly, meaning he bangs his very heavy head on the floor & when he screams & throws his 32 lb body around, he's like a rag doll in my arms, killing my back :)
If I did not have a relationship w/the Lord & know that I have salvation from Jesus my savior, I would not be able to survive this insane ride. My husband and I look forward to relaxing and no more autism in eternal life!! I hope you have this same hope in His Promises- Heather

Anonymous said...

There is help out there. I am not sure where you live but you need to get in touch with a professional associated with DIR/Floortime. . . you and your child do not have to live like this! I can sooo feel your frustration. . and his!